I wish I could put into words just exactly how I feel or what I am going through emotionally. I keep telling myself to wake up and get out of this cycle. This battle that I am enduring I can't get up from. I feel like every time I turn around I'm getting pushed back down. I hate how I feel in my clothes and I was working so hard to fix it and it seemed that it wasn't working. I am so tired of struggling. So tired of going in circles. Losing and gaining the same 7 lbs..over and over again. I'm so exhausted.
I miss running. I miss the way running made me feel. I would give anything to have that back. I could go back but I can't run long distance anymore, not with my hips. I have to be extra careful as it is. Even though one tear has been repaired, the other has not. The last run a couple weeks ago I over did it and hurt for the rest of the week. I need to be smarter about it and follow a beginners plan and use the run/walk method. It won't make me less of a runner by doing this.
I could go back to running and PIYO, PIYO will keep my joints and muscles strong and stretched.
Maybe that's the plan I need to take.
Every time I put a plan on paper and I get off track I feel like a total failure. I feel like Moses in the desert. Lord help me!
